weekend sadness...

Going to the funeral of a child is an incredibly sad and moving thing.  Our friends' grandchild, Zane, had had his first birthday only 10 days before he died.  At the funeral, a slideshow of memories was played throughout the entire event.  Pictures of him and his family from the day he was born till his first birthday party flashed on the screen, showing an incredibly happy family going about their lives. When his little casket was wheeled in, his mother collapsed into a heap of tears on the floor.  His father, leaned down and covered his wife.  It makes me cry, again,  just typing this.

It was especially poignant for me, I think, because of the death of my own nephew 2 years ago.  He was 25, but the sentiments of his parents and family were the same, I am sure, of the family there before me.  Crushing. Tragic.  Unbelieving.  Desolate. 

I knew exactly what the week before the funeral had been like for all of them. Just like ours had been for us. 

When my brother-in-law had to go out and find a gravesite for his son.  When the family had to put together a fitting obituary.  When edits were needed for the words that would be spoken to the congregated at the funeral.  When clothes had to be chosen for their son to wear in the casket.  Beyond comprehension for me before that time and then, I was living it with my sister and her family. 

Yes, I do know what that family had suffered and would suffer.  It was so incredibly painful to watch.  And I could only pray for them and their grief and try to send waves of love and consolation their way.

That is what all of us, all of those souls sitting in that church during that funeral, were doing for that family.  All we could do and what we should do. 

Comments

[Tonya]

Your post was absolutely gut-wrenching. That poor mom. And dad.

[PainterWoman]

Everyone who dies is somebody's child... it's the relatively innocent youth that gets us, I think.. unless, of course, it is your OWN child, or it reminds you of your own child(ren). I counseled parents of a 3-letter highschool senior/athlete killed by a drunk driver the same year my daughter was to graduate... Cried more at that stranger's memorial than at my own parents' services.... And of course, when there is no time to prepare, the shock is numbing.
So I am especially glad you could remember and re-create such a charming blue-bird of happiness.

[gkgirl]

that was so sad...
i could feel the sting of tears
as i read what you wrote about
the mother collapsing...

so hard...such loss

[Elizabeth]

I cannot imagine living through such pain--- how do you go on living? I am so sorry---

[Laura]

That is my worst nightmare. I knew a family who went through this, and they were never the same. They were happy again, and lived, but were never, ever the same.

[Loretta]

I can't think of anything more sad. My heart and prayers are with you all.

[Barbara W. Klaser]

It's a wonder parents ever survive a tragedy like that. So sad. My heart goes out to your friends.

[isay]

with deepest sympathy.....

[Margaret]

The feelings are hard for me to deal with, having lost two younger brothers at 16 and 23. I know the devastation, and the feeling of unreality all too well.

[Marilyn]

How very, very sad.

[Arlene]

My heart just aches when I read this. I cannot possibly imagine how much this hurts.

[leslie]

I have never had to go through the same experience, but just reading your words brings tears to my eyes.

[Stephanie]

I can't imagine what it would be like going to a child's funeral. It makes me so sad just to think about it. What a tragic loss for your friends.